How They Make BBQ Sauce

Last week i travelled to a small town called 'wow voice' to learn how bbq sauce is made. this is something that i have been puzzled by for some time now and because i didn't know what it was i wasn't going to eat it. my tour guide pete took me around his factory which isn't really a factory and the people who work there work for free. pete runs his operation from a disused car park and there isn't really a building because they found out that open-air-bbq-sauce-manufacturing produces the best bbq sauce. how they make it is like this: pete has got a bunch of the more heavy-set locals to arrange themselves around what is called the bbq line (the bbq line is basically just 8 bbq's placed end to end). large men stand around in shorts drinking beer and watching the things get cooked. it is best to make bbq sauce in high summer when the men can really sweat. the smell of the cooking excites the men and they are dripping with meat-and-beer sweat. then a technician comes around with cotton swabs and swabs the men for their sweat concentrate. the men are allowed to joke about and spit on the grill. the run off from the grill is then cooled and given to the men to drink and then sweat back out. making them drink lots of beer loosens them up and they spit while they talk about the big game. after 2 lots of grill run-off has been passed through them the swab technician gets the best sauce out of the men. if it is raining they put up a tarpaulin to cover the grills and the men. thanks to pete for his time i had a great day.